Every hand bound book or journal I sell is supposed to contain a little slip of paper providing people with some basic care instructions. The hand bound copies of Worshiping Loki sent out in late August did not contain these bits of paper. I couldn’t find my supply of them and it would have taken several days for me to have more printed; I opted to ship the books even without this little extra item.

The information on this little piece of paper is now contained here: https://walkingtheheartroad.com/hand-bound-books/  This way the information is available at all times, to anyone who needs it. Hand bound books are just a little different than traditional books; they feel a little different, function a little different, and react to changes in humidity just a little differently. I’ve had no shortage of traditional books bow and buckle as I’ve brought them from, say, San Francisco to Salt Lake City (and vice versa), so bear in mind that any sudden change in humidity can cause a book to behave a little strangely. This is normal and it can be easily corrected with a little time and patience.

Hand bound books are creatures of wet and dry. They are responsive to their environment, which means that they can be shaped and, to some degree, reshaped as necessary. If you’ve received your little black and gold book and discovered that the cover boards are crisp and lovely one day and slightly bowed the next, please refer to the hand bound books page. Your book is simply reacting to its environment. Set it under weight and in a couple days it will start to behave again.

The final pre-order copies of Worshiping Loki have been shipped; I’ve added tracking info to each Paypal invoice so everyone who ordered a copy should see an email with tracking information though it can take some time for the numbers to enter the USPS system and receive updates, especially for international orders.

As stated, there are still a few copies still available. The special pricing was only in effect during the pre-order period; each copy is $55 + $3.50 shipping (international shipping is available; please contact me for a shipping estimate if you require one).

This has been an enormous undertaking and so, so worthwhile. I’ve learned a lot about running this sort of project and with any luck the next time around I’ll be able to do it with even greater effectiveness. Yes – I’ll do another limited issue, hand bound book project in the future. I have no idea what that book might be about and it certainly won’t be offered anytime soon, but I’d love to do this again.

At last! The first several hand bound books have been taken to the post office. The remainder will be taken on Monday.

The dedication rite was also held this morning (here you can see a partial stack just before the candles were lit; there really are a lot of books).

Getting these in the mail felt wonderfully conclusive. This project is very nearly over – at least, the physical aspect of it. These particular books will go out to do their work in the world and that’s exciting to think about, though they’re also beginning to leave my sphere of awareness just like any completed spell does.

Of course, the process of bringing the entire Worshiping Loki project into being is only partially completed. Next I’ll be working with a print designer to prepare the standard issue copy; some of the design work will also have an impact on the electronic copy, which will be released at the same time, I expect. I’ll keep you updated as these upcoming stages develop.

Thanks again.

At long last, the first handful of books are going under weight for the final time. They’ll cure overnight and if all goes well, they’ll be pristine and perfect in the morning. While I’m waiting for the glue to dry and set, I’ll begin preparing the packaging for shipping.

A few days ago I placed an order with Beth Wodandis for a fresh Loki candle and some Sigyn incense. I’m quite fond of her candles and was eagerly looking forward to her most recent restock. The candle and incense arrived today – just in time for the book dedication ritual. Though I prefer to do ritual at night, because the books have to sit overnight I’ll aim to do the ritual in the morning. They’ll also be signed and numbered tomorrow.

This is a very good night.

Like I said in my last book making update, I’m about 10 days behind schedule – which isn’t terrible, but nor is it what I wanted. To keep the process transparent, I’d like to share a picture of today’s production.

It might not look terribly exciting but these are some bound text blocks (the top stack) and some finished text blocks (the bottom stack). The finished ones are ready to be set into the cover boards. 😀

I realized I’ve been a bit reluctant to share pictures of the progress because for the most part, book binding looks pretty boring. There’s a lot of glue and stacks of paper. It’s not until everything is put together at the very end that it starts to look interesting. Still, everyone has given me a very profound gift of trust and I owe it to the many people who have supported this project to be as forthright as possible. A big batch of books will go under weight this evening, which means that the first wave of shipping will occur sometime tomorrow. I’ve had some car trouble this week but I can hop on the bus first thing in the morning and go down to the post office without too much difficulty (assuming that my gimpy leg is going to allow me that much walking).

I’m honored and humbled at the amazing support that has been shown for this project. It’s been a real adventure – and I can’t wait to do it again. Thanks again.

(This post started out as a reply to Redfaery on the post Is There Work For Me? I wanted to clarify that though my polytheism and my spirit work are fundamentally connected, they are not exactly the same thing. I’d like to nip in the bud any line of thought that states that our human love is capital, labor, or employment. Though a number of polytheists happen to be spirit workers, polytheism is a religious framework and spirit work is….well, something a little different that I’ve struggled for a very long time to put into clear language. Basically I want to make very clear that the distinct, personal, individual, and sweetly human love for the divine is too precious and valuable to be treated like labor, even though there may sometimes be effort involved. So this is to Redfaery, a dear and sweetly devoted person whose love of Saraswati touches me deeply – but it’s also to anyone else who I may have made feel slighted or diminished by my words. I’m sorry. I love your love and I honor your affection.)

I sincerely hope that I haven’t contributed to your feelings of discontent. I believe some bloggers and writers (myself included) consciously or unconsciously draw on the terminology of the “Great Work” as referenced in various magical traditions. (Precisely what the Great Work is in these contexts is also not terribly clear because it’s understood that each individual practitioner will discover its nuances and particulars as they apply themselves to study and practice according to the guidelines of the tradition they’re part of.)

When I personally talk about the Work, I’m referring specifically to my Work, and this Work is the cosmic, macro-level aspect of my daily, micro-level spirit work, which is a service-oriented and tutorial relationship with a great many spirits and Powers wherein I provide a lot of ground-level, go-fer style assistance to making Their presence more firmly established in this world and/or aiding Them in Their work and/or providing Them with the things They have difficulty providing for Themselves (this last bit is especially true in the case of spirits). These are endeavors that anyone can do, should they feel motivated to. Indeed, by expressing our love and affection for Them in a myriad ways, we are already fulfilling the first task I named.

Even though our worship and affection might have some instrumental facet, I feel that there’s some potential danger in characterizing the emotionally-based relationships we share with the High Ones as labor. Humans are not engines that produce an exhaust of loving emotion. We should be cautious about labeling our love as labor or employment; it is a short jump from there to thinking of our love as capital – which leads us right back to the vending machine model of divine relationship that many of us work so hard to root out in our own hearts and minds. (The vending machine model being that the High Ones dispense blessings when love is shoved inside them. This is perspective is demeaning to us and Them, but it is a model that nonetheless pops up in sacred relationships from time to time.)

Love is valuable for its own reasons, for its own sake, for its own experience. There is effort involved in the cultivation of emotional capacity, in the uprooting of psychological baggage that prevents or distorts the experience of love, and there is effort required in persisting in affection when injury is felt. Love, however, has a self-sustaining character. It arises spontaneously, blossoming from itself and creating its own increase. The experience of love might be effortless, unexpected, sudden – but it is not employment. I shouldn’t think of my affection as currency or labor; I hope you don’t, either.

Love is not production. Love is not capital.

I engage in spirit work because it was an opportunity presented me by a god I love. It is a path of service, self-improvement, insight, and growth that is fueled by my love for the divine and for this world. I took it up because my spiritual trajectory (my dharm, if you will), clouded the appeal and availability of other outcomes. There were other options in the choice I was offered, but there was only one correct one. My spirit work is an expression of my love. It is one facet of my affection, but conflating my useful potential – my capital – for my ability and capacity to love the gods is a mistake. This is a mistake I’ve made numerous times and it’s one that I will make many, many more times. I’d like to warn people away from the heartache and damage the results from this mistake.

You are not an engine of affection. Love from pleasure. Love from desire. Love from spiritual loneliness and a longing for celestial (or infernal!) comfort. Love for the High Ones cannot be contracted, bought, or bartered for. It is presence freely given – from us to Them.

I’ve been a bit scarce this month because I’ve been pretty wrapped up in work, job-related writing, and book making. I started drafting a post on my experiences at Many Gods West but haven’t quite finished it. I’ll get to that sooner or later because there are a few things I’d like to share about it.

I also haven’t quite gotten around to talking about some recent shifts that have happened in my own practice. I’m not going to share a lot of details but put simply, I’ve entered a new stage of practice that I’m both excited by and intimidated by. The shift has also not been without its share of sad aspects. My work with Loki’s feminine aspect has sadly come to an end for the time being. Loki’s masculine aspect is also pulling back for the foreseeable future because I need to give some very focused attention to other Powers who I haven’t mentioned on this blog before.

For several months now I’ve been working with the Tetrad++, a group of six (and growing!) Powers that chose PSVL as their first channel into this world. PSVL is not the boss of the Tetrad++ nor any kind of spokesperson; e has had the opportunity to introduce these Powers to us and They’ve done the rest. To say that the Tetrad++ is a group of transgender and gender-variant deities is a rather unfair abbreviation of who They are; each has Their own personality and each highlights different features that we humans might regard as variations in form, sexuality, and gender expression. I’d suggest browsing PSVL’s Tetrad++ tag for some more information on these Powers and Their presence in this world. Merri-Todd’s blog also has a number of lovely prayers dedicated to the individuals within the group.

Two of the Tetrad++, the twins Panpsyche and Panhyle, have been on the outer edges of my spiritual life for nearly a year. They arrived when I did (what I expected to be) a small ritual of ancestor elevation for the gender-variant and transgender dead. Their sudden and very distinct arrival smacked me hard, and They didn’t come alone. I’ve never had a ritual so well attended or so powerfully, tangibly crowded. I was wiped out for a couple days afterward and that kind of fatigue hadn’t been part of my life for a while. They never left, though They pulled back to some degree. I began working on a craft project with Them in mind. I’ll share more about that another time.

Loki informed me on Saturday that He was leaving and so was She. Though He dropped by later that evening with a final instruction, that was all the good-bye I got. This actually isn’t that unusual. Loki just fucks off sometimes and doesn’t come back for a while. It’s sad, but I’ve been too busy to be sad. As Loki walked off into the distance there was a rather stern looking Panhyle waiting for my attention. He’s been a bit of a taskmaster for the past several days. His sister has been spending time seated on my ancestor/beloved dead altar tending to the spirit of a rather traumatized young woman who followed me home on Saturday night. Part of the shift that took place unlocked some interesting new spiritual skills; I believe this spirit is just the first of many.

Panhyle is making sure that I take care of building an altar for Panpsyche and Himself, along with the rest of the Tetrad++ (who I’m less familiar with on a personal level). I’m also changing up my beloved dead altar to make it more accommodating for the spirits of the human dead I’ll be picking up along the way. I’m actually quite excited about building a little house for the spirits, though it’s going to take a lot of time since I get the impression that second hand/repurposed items are going to be the first acquisitions.

Oh, and I’ll also be looking for the most elaborate chalice-like item I can find because I have the great and intimidating pleasure of working with our mother of abominations, Babalon Herself. 😀 And She’s going to bring all Her friends! 😀 😀 I really am thrilled about this. Intimidated – but oh, so excited.

I have a lot more to say about the amazing spiritual process that has run parallel to this book project. I have a lot more to say about Panhyle and Panpsyche and my poor dear spirit guest. I probably have some weepy statements about missing My Lord and His inimitable feminine side. (I miss them both already, so much. Weep, weep.) I have more to say about my endless list of writing projects, all of which are exciting and not getting nearly the attention they deserve because I’m busy trying to keep up with my jobs. I have a few things to say about my travel and presentation plans in the next several months. I also have a very little to say about my health stuff, which has sadly not improved. Nothing is known at this point but I’m following up on my doctor’s instructions to make an appointment with a neurologist, which I’ve finally requested. I’ll schedule one as soon as I’m contacted so perhaps I’ll have some more information soon.

When it became clear that the writing project that would become Worshiping Loki was going to be made available as a handmade book, I rather knew that it would have some pointed spiritual consequences. That’s because books – like many other objects – have the potential to function on spiritual and metaphysical levels. This extra-dimensional functioning is driven in part by the animating spirit of the project itself; the Loki and Odin devotionals have their own energy currents that they are part of, too. The Worshiping Loki project was a little different, though. It was a little more potent, a little more discrete, a little more dangerous.

Books are objects that carry ideas around inside them.

Crafting magical objects of any kind leaves the maker open to all kinds of interesting side effects.

There’s been some deep psychic shifts in my life just as the final .pdf file of the book was going to print. It’s being printed now as I’m feeling out the new spiritual architecture and wondering what all these changes mean.

I have underestimated the transformative power of art. These are changes I didn’t expect.

********

The book had, perhaps not surprisingly, a ten day printing delay when my first option became suddenly unavailable. This required me to seek out another cost-competitive printer and then reformat some of my files to meet their standard. Going with this second option has required a great deal of faith on my part since I won’t be able to oversee any of the actual production. Being forced into a sort of intellectual darkness while this process occurs is perhaps fitting.

Assuming everything goes according to schedule, I’ll pick up the pages from the printer tonight. Folding, punching, and binding the text blocks should be completed by Monday; all the text blocks should be set by Tuesday night. The glue should be done curing by Wednesday and the rite I’ve prepared will be performed at that time. Each copy will be signed and numbered, then packaged and brought to the post office. The final packages should go out on Saturday. Shipping notices will be sent.

All told, the ten day delay is not so very terrible; shipping is scheduled to take place before the last day of the month and circumstances have lined up very neatly to expedite the last stages of this work. I thank everyone for their patience in this work. It’s going to be worth waiting for, I’m quite sure of that.