I know many people are anxiously awaiting news on the release of Worshiping Loki. Truth be told, I was waiting around for news, too. A hitch in communication delayed a final approval by a couple weeks and I was left in the dark wondering what was happening. Things have been worked out and, if everything goes as planned, I’ll be holding a sample copy of the printed book sometime tomorrow. Again, if things go as planned, I’ll have around half the original print run produced by Wednesday, which means I can take a bunch to PantheaCon with me. The rest will be listed on Etsy for easy sale there. I’ll certainly keep you updated.
It’s too simplistic to say that things involving Loki will get messy and complicated and chaotic. That’s not exactly how it works; He’s not like a five pound weight that directly and obviously affects any scale He’s placed on. The Powers add tendencies, patterns, flavors to situations. People seek to magically shape circumstances with the help of the tendencies, patterns, and flavors of things like herbs, crystals, colors, and moon phase but the rosemary and the full moon phase do not cause a spell’s success. These energies, directed by the witch, influence tendencies that are unfolding. The Powers similarly influence tendencies. In Loki’s case, tendencies are affected through the addition of destabilizing factors.
People sometimes wonder aloud how it’s possible to live in close proximity to the Powers and still have a stable, functioning life. I wondered that too for a long time. While it’s probably not a great idea to look at another person’s life and declare it more functional or stable than one’s own, I remember how terrible it was to always feel destabilized and a breath away from disaster. Crawling out of that was very, very hard and I’m not sure there was any one strategy that worked. Even now as I have the privilege and luxury of enjoying a measure of stability I’m often petrified by the awareness of how precarious everything about my life actually is.
But the thing is – everyone’s life is pretty precarious. We are all a single car accident away from debilitating injury – of ourselves or someone we love. As a junior in college I fell on sidewalk hard enough to permanently damage my knee; that’s why you see me walking with a cane sometimes. I just fell. Illness, disability, loss, poverty, and death are always a breath away. Skipping successfully from one moment to another is not guaranteed. As the investment commercials helpfully remind us, past performance is not an indicator of future success.
Given the fundamental uncertainty about the future, I decided to toss my lot in with Loki because why the hell not? If there are no guarantees in life, no promises that can be counted on, no material safety net that will protect against any threat, and no way to prepare for the dangers of life why shouldn’t I let myself enjoy the things I actually want? Acknowledging that I wanted Him – in worship, proximity, affection, and sacrifice – helped me clarify my priorities. If all health, all jobs, all affection, and even all divine grace are fleeting and uncertain I could see no reason to delay present satisfaction.
Currently, my strategy for achieving and maintaining some measure of success is to have very modest needs and desires. Simple living (or simplified living, at the very least) has been good. I’ve known people who set very high standards for their personal success and had very clear ideas about what success looked like and how to achieve it. Those people were never very happy. Scaling back expectations can be a healthy thing and it’s something I often engage in. See, there are things I’d like to change in my life, there are forms of success I long for if only because these would allow me greater freedom to do the things I want to do. But living in that future someday is to invite profound dissatisfaction with Things As They Are. I don’t want that. I don’t want to feel dissatisfied with my cozy apartment, my minimal jobs, or my simple means.
But anyway – Worshiping Loki will soon be available. It’s a small book and producing even a small book reminds me of just how hard authors actually work, especially those of us who oversee all aspects of production ourselves. Having done this one, I’m even more confident of being able to do it again.
I have shop updates to make and I have other projects on my table waiting for focused attention. As I make progress with these I’ll announce them. For now, just know that very exciting things are happening and I can’t wait to share them with you.