I’ve talked a little bit about working with Loki’s feminine aspect – Her aspect as a feminine being as distinct from masculine Loki in drag or masculine Loki being fabulous or gender-bent. Lady Loki (as Heather Freysdottir refers to Her) has been the primary form and persona I’ve interacted with for going on two years. It’s been a surprising and illuminating journey.
Her presence in my life was firmly cemented after a complex ritual working involving some other Powers but She wasn’t new at that point, just less seen. In these initial months She was nearly always a sketchy, nervous creature that lived alone in a cave. Over time, Her personality expanded to a full, sparkling brightness with a weight of lust that sat heavily on the tongue. She is always, perfectly, Loki – but strange and new at the same time.
Following my psychic death experience many years ago, my first and possibly hardest task was the let go of all expectations and assumptions regarding my relationship with Loki. Everything I expected, hoped for, assumed, anticipated, or looked forward to had to be dumped entirely in order to embrace Loki’s fundamentally dynamic nature (and my own, but that would come somewhat later). I had to be willing to fully love every aspect Loki displayed, every form of interaction, every potential outcome, every relationship configuration, every period of drought or saturation. I had to learn to hold Him very loosely. (I am not always great at this last part.)
Her arrival could not have happened without me getting lots of practice simply accepting what She had to share without projecting unwarranted desires or assumptions onto our interactions. Perhaps this emotional space allowed Her to grow exactly as She wished to. I humbly suspect that I was able to provide Her with as ideal a stage for growth as She might find. Giving Her a space to become firmly situated in this world has been a stunning honor and pleasure.
The Powers are infectious and some more than others. She’s been busy. A year ago I hadn’t encountered but a few slight, passing references to Her in people’s lives. Now She is emerging into many spaces through many minds and hearts. I wrote a piece about Her for inclusion in an anthology on Loki (which hasn’t been published yet; no word on release date). I talked about Her at PantheaCon. I brought Her to Many Gods West. She has a prominent place in Worshiping Loki, so people will soon start to encounter Her that way. She is expanding.
Now comes the next step.
I’ve been working on a few clay sculptures of my Beloved.
It’s pretty clear I don’t work in polymer clay very often. I prefer stoneware and occasionally ceramic. Each one is a little better than the last.
The one on the far left, in front of the icon, will be offered for sale pretty soon. It stands about 5.5″ high and features an abstract sprig of mistletoe on the skirt and a necklace after the Viking style. Lady Loki really likes necklaces with big, bright jewels and bold designs. The choice of a Viking style necklace is also a nod to the way She appeared for a long time – in a blue and white apron dress with little black slippers.
I’m going to keep making a few more of these figures. Not sure how many or really even for what purpose. If one sells I’ll put another up for sale. Past that I’m not sure. All I know is that making the icons is the next step in this work. It’s very exciting.